It's always been a pet peeve of mine when patients are rude in the hospital. I know they are sick, in pain, and scared so they get away with a lot from sensitive me, but there is definitely a limit. And, definitely, it sometimes crosses a line. Here is some free advice for those rare few who think the hospital is a Hilton.
1. You will not get a full night of sleep. IV pumps beep. Nurses take vitals. Delirious patients next door scream. Doctors make rounds before the sun comes up. Your cozy bed is at home. Oh yeah, and you are sick. Why is it so surprising to people when they can't sleep?
2. Hospitals are not substitutes for your home, nurses for your children, or doctors for your spouse. This is maybe my biggest soap box, and maybe the one people will argue with the most. I am amazed by the number of times it is the family member who request that their loved one be hospitalized, and often it isn't because of the extent of their illness. It's usually because Daughter Donna doesn't have any more PTO, or it's the middle of the night and Sister Suzy has to work in the morning, or Local Pharmacy doesn't deliver meds until afternoon so Dad can't get his morning meds at home. I'm thankful to not be one of the millions trapped in the sandwich generation, so I wholly admit to a lack of sympathy. (Although empathy I have.) Still, it is rare that the slow fade of health, memory, and strength sneak up on people. It takes awareness, honesty, and difficult planning to prepare for it. Fun - no. Worth it - yes! Ailing parents, consider what your stubborn independence does to your children when you hurt yourself. Spouses, protect, don't cover for your loved one. Busy children, get your priorities in line. And everyone, accept help when it's offered so you don't have to demand it when it's too late.
3. Stop complaining about the food. First of all, it isn't that bad. Secondly, it's usually your doctor who tells the cafeteria not to bring you salty french fries, or pure sugar syrup, or a 3000 calorie hamburger because that is what we've been telling you to eat (or not eat) at home for years.
4. Therapy is for your benefit, so don't refuse it for lame reasons. That goes for physical therapy (which is what I see refused most often), but also for lab draws, replacing blown IV's, and going down to the radiology department to get a better quality X-ray when you know they could wheel the portable unit up to your bed. "I'm too tired," is the reason we ordered it in the first place. Getting better isn't comfortable.
5. When it's time to go - Go! Maybe this echos some of #2. Still, when you're in the ER at 2AM and don't know what to do because you aren't prepared, I can consent to the admission. But, after three days of fighting with "utilization review" and explaining medical necessity to your insurance company, you have to go. That's plenty of time to meet with social work, arrange home health care, pick a nursing home, get Betty Jo to fly in from California, learn how to give injections, or make arrangements with your employer. The truth is, once we've done all we can to help you, sitting in a hospital can actually harm you - the risk of infection exposure, medication errors, anemia from repetitive blood draws, radiation exposure from repetitive imaging, falls, and not to mention draining your (or the government's) bank account. Please, just go.
Thank you to the 95% of agreeable, pleasant patients. And to the rest of you, I still really do like you and want you to get better even when you frustrate the crap out of me.
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